《红字-the scarlet letter(英文版)》

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红字-the scarlet letter(英文版)- 第38部分


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 world beyond the grave; of two spirits who hadbeen intimately connected in their former life; but now stood coldlyshuddering; in mutual dread; as not yet familiar with their state; norwonted to the panionship of disembodied beings。 Each a ghost; andawe…stricken at the other ghost! They were awe…stricken likewise atthemselves; because the crisis flung back to them their consciousness;and revealed to each heart its history and experience; as life neverdoes; except at such breathless epochs。 The soul beheld its featuresin the mirror of the passing moment。 It was with fear; andtremulously; and; as it were; by a slow; reluctant necessity; thatArthur Dimmesdale put forth his hand; chill as death; and touchedthe chill hand of Hester Prynne。 The grasp; cold as it was; tookaway what was dreariest in the interview。 They now felt themselves; atleast; inhabitants of the same sphere。  Without a word more spoken… neither he nor she assuming theguidance; but with an unexpressed consent… they glided back into theshadow of the woods; whence Hester had emerged; and sat down on theheap of moss where she and Pearl had before been sitting。 When theyfound voice to speak; it was; at first; only to utter remarks andinquiries such as any tight have made; about thegloomy sky; the threatening storm; and; next; the health of each。 Thusthey went onward; not boldly; but step by step; into the themes thatwere brooding deepest in their hearts。 So long estranged by fate andcircumstances; they needed something slight and casual to runbefore; and throw open the doors of intercourse; so that their realthoughts might be led across the threshold。  After a while; the minister fixed his eyes on Hester Prynne's。  〃Hester;〃 said he; 〃hast thou found peace?〃  She smiled drearily; looking down upon her bosom。  〃Hast thou?〃 she asked。  〃None!… nothing but despair!〃 he answered。 〃What else could I lookfor; being what I am; and leading such a life as mine? Were I anatheist… a man devoid of conscience… a wretch with coarse and brutalinstincts… I might have found peace; long ere now。 Nay; I never shouldhave lost it! But; as matters stand with my soul; whatever of goodcapacity there originally was in me; all of God's gifts that werethe choicest have bee the ministers of spiritual torment。 Hester; Iam most miserable。〃  〃The people reverence thee;〃 said Hester。 〃And surely thou workestgood among them! Doth this bring thee no fort?〃  〃More misery; Hester!… only the more misery!〃 answered theclergyman; with a bitter smile。 〃As concerns the good which I mayappear to do; I have no faith in it。 It must needs be a delusion。 Whatcan a ruined soul; like mine; effect towards the redemption of othersouls?… or a polluted soul; towards their purification? And as for thepeople's reverence; would that it were turned to scorn and hatred!Canst thou deem it; Hester; a consolation; that I must stand up inmy pulpit; and meet so many eyes turned upward to my face; as if thelight of heaven were beaming from it!… must see my flock hungry forthe truth; and listening to my words as if a tongue of Pentecostwere speaking!… and then look inward; and discern the black reality ofwhat they idolise? I have laughed; in bitterness and agony of heart;at the contrast between what I seem and what I am! And Satan laughs atit!〃  〃You wrong yourself in this;〃 said Hester gently。 〃You have deeplyand sorely repented。 Your sin is left behind you; in the days longpast。 Your present life is not less holy; in very truth; than it seemsin people's eyes。 Is there no reality in the penitence thus sealed andwitnessed by good works? And wherefore should it not bring you peace?〃  〃No; Hester; no!〃 replied the clergyman。 〃There is no substance init! It is cold and dead; and can do nothing for me! Of penance; I havehad enough! Of penitence; there has been none! Else; I should long agohave thrown off these garments of mock holiness; and have shown myselfto mankind as they will see me at the judgment…seat。 Happy are you;Hester; that wear the scarlet letter openly upon your bosom! Mineburns in secret! Thou little knowest what a relief it is; after thetorment of a seven years' cheat; to look into an eye that recognisesme for what I am! Had I one friend… or were it my worst enemy!… towhom; when sickened with the praises of all other men; I could dailybetake myself; and be known as the vilest of all sinners; methinksmy soul might keep itself alive thereby。 Even thus much of truth wouldsave me! But; now; it is all falsehood!… all emptiness!… all death!〃  Hester Prynne looked into his face; but hesitated to speak。 Yet;uttering his long…restrained emotions so vehemently as he did; hiswords here offered her the very point of circumstances in which tointerpose what she came to say。 She conquered her fears; and spoke。  〃Such a friend as thou hast even now wished for;〃 said she; 〃withwhom to weep over thy sin; thou has in me; the partner of it!〃 Againshe hesitated; but brought out the words with an effort; 〃Thou hastlong had such an enemy; and dwellest with him; under the same roof!〃  The minister started to his feet; gasping for breath; andclutching at his heart; as if he would have torn it out of his bosom。  〃Ha! What sayest thou!〃 cried he。 〃An enemy! And under mine ownroof! What mean you?〃  Hester Prynne was now fully sensible of the deep injury for whichshe was responsible to this unhappy man; in permitting him to liefor so many years; or; indeed; for a single moment; at the mercy ofone whose purposes could not be other than malevolent。 The verycontiguity of his enemy; beneath whatever mask the latter mightconceal himself; was enough to disturb the magic sphere of abeing so sensitive as Arthur Dimmesdale。 There had been a periodwhen Hester was less alive to this consideration; or; perhaps; inthe misanthropy of her own trouble; she left the minister to bear whatshe might picture to herself as a more tolerable doom。 But of late;since the night of his vigil; all her sympathies towards him hadbeen both softened and invigorated。 She now read his heart moreaccurately。 She doubted not; that the continual presence of RogerChillingworth the secret poison of his malignity; infecting all theair about him… and his authorised interference; as a physician; withthe minister's physical and spiritual infirmities… that these badopportunities had been turned to a cruel purpose。 By means of them;the sufferer's conscience had been kept in an irritated state; thetendency of which was; not to cure by wholesome pain; but todisorganise and corrupt his spiritual being。 Its result; on earth;could hardly fail to be insanity; and hereafter; that eternalalienation from the Good and True; of which madness is perhaps theearthly type。  Such was the ruin to which she had brought the man; once… nay; whyshould we not speak it?… still so passionately loved! Hester felt thatthe sacrifice of the clergyman's good name; and death itself; as shehad already told Roger Chillingworth; would have been infinitelypreferable to the alternative which she had taken upon herself tochoose。 And now; rather than have had this grievous wrong toconfess; she would gladly have lain down on the forest…leaves; anddied there; at Arthur Dimmesdale's feet。  〃O Arthur;〃 cried she; 〃forgive me! In all things else; I havestriven to be true! Truth was the one virtue which I might have heldfast; and did hold fast; through all extremity; save when thy good…thy life thy fame… were put in question! Then I consented to adeception。 But a lie is never good; even though death threaten onthe other side! Dost thou not see what I would say? That old man!… thephysician!… he whom they call Roger Chillingworth!… he was myhusband!〃  The minister looked at her; for an instant; with all that violenceof passion; which… intermixed; in more shapes than one; with hishigher; purer; softer qualities… was; in fact; the portion of himwhich the Devil claimed; and through which he sought to win therest。 Never was there a blacker or a fiercer frown than Hester nowencountered。 For the brief space that it lasted; it was a darktransfiguration。 But his character had been so much enfeebled bysuffering; that even its lower energies were incapable of more thana temporary struggle。 He sank down on the ground; and buried hisface in his hands。  〃I might have known it;〃 murmured he。 〃I did know it! Was not thesecret told me; in the natural recoil of my heart; at the firstsight of him; and as often as I have seen him since? Why did I notunderstand? O Hester Prynne; thou little; little knowest all thehorror of this thing! And the shame!… the indelicacy!… the horribleugliness of this exposure of a sick and guilty heart to the very eyethat would gloat over it? Woman; woman; thou are accountable for this!I cannot forgive thee!〃  〃Thou shalt forgive me!〃 cried Hester; flinging herself on thefallen leaves beside him。 〃Let God punish! Thou shalt forgive!〃  With sudden and desperate tenderness; she threw her arms around him;and pressed his head against her bosom; little caring though his cheekrested on the scarlet letter。 He would have released himself; butstrove in vain to do so。 Hester would not set him free; lest he shouldlook her sternly in the face。 All the world had frowned on her… forseven long years had it frowned upon this lonely woman… and stillshe bore
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